anxiety attacks when I leave him

[LanaHamilton]

Hi all! Have to say I love this forum and the information I have received has been so wonderful. Freddie is my first yorkie and the love of my life. Here recently (he's almost 10 mos. old) everytime I leave he just throws a fit. The reason I know this my husband was home, I had gone to the store and Freddie was crying going to the front door than the back door. He said it broke his heart. Than this weekend we went to a party was only gone about 3 hours and when I got home he just cried and cried of course he was happy to see me...but telling me don't leave again. I work mon. - fri., he used to be sad but he got over it. Does anyone else have this problem?

[msyorktown]

Hi Lana..I have no advice but i just wanted to say Welcome and Freddie is adorable!

[LanaHamilton]

Thank you so much! I love this site..so much great information.

[GeorgiesMomma]

Hi Lana,

Freddie is a doll baby I can tell in the picture how much you both love each other Georgie is similar to Freddie he hates when we leave. He has grown in his 7 years very attached to my husband as well so he gets upset when either of us leave. I think that's what has helped too. Maybe have your husband feed him, talk to him, give belly rubs ect....Hopefully that will help with his anxiety when you are gone. I also think (and have 7 years of experience with this) that Georgie plays us and tries to pity us not to leave. When we do leave we put him in our (excuse me his) bed give him water and his toys and leave the TV on. I used to worry about him constantly but now I know he is just fine and is excited when we get home. I am sure others can offer more advice as well. I look forward to more pics of Freddie. Good luck!

[LanaHamilton]

That's a great idea! I am the one who feeds him and all the fun that comes with raising a yorkie. My husband adores Freddie too but I'm the care giver. I'll try that because it just breaks my heart to think that he thinks I have left him. Thank you so much for the advise!

[concretegurl]

Toys tv on or radio and dogswell mellow mut jerky worked for me in conjunction with leaving traini g.

Pretend to leave and come back extending the time as you go.

[yorkietalkjilly]

Most anxious dogs that aren't used to it get nervous and anxious when their owners leave the home. Firstly, take all emotion out of your leaving. Do not feel sad for him or tell him goodbye - just like pack leaders in the wild don't when they decide to go on a hunt or take a walk - they just walk away and nobody freaks. They are impersonal and matter-of-fact in how and what they must do. So no emotional goodbyes or hello's when arriving home. Act like a pack leader. Your dog is a pack animal and is genetically in tune with a firm leader.
As far as your actual leaving, just slowly desensitize him to your leaving and soon he will come to accept it. But you must desensitize him to it slowly and allow him to adjust to each step. Be patient with that baby - his anxiety can be overcome with time and patience and knowing what to do. Keep your training sessions short and impersonal, matter-of-fact. (You can reward him once each exercise is over with a big, loving play session and lots of loving hugs, kisses.)
Give him a lovely food-stuffed kong toy, sit down and watch him playing with it, take up your keys and purse and whatever else you do as if to leave home and sit back down and just watch him. Don't go anywhere. Just sit there. Now this is key: keep repeating this for a day or two on a weekend over and over, giving him different things to chew on or play with as you get ready to go but don't.

After a day or two of this, when he's playing with his kong and has accepted your getting your things together, get your keys/purse, watch him for a while then get up and without saying one word to him or looking in his direction, just like an alpha wolf who acts in its pack without question from one of his pack members, walk out of your door outside. Shut it. Stand there 10 seconds and walk back in, DO NOT NOTICE HIM AT ALL, no matter how he's dancing around your feet or whining in joy, put your things away and sit back down where you usually sit when you watch him with his kong toy. Repeat this over & over and keep increasing your times outside to let him learn slowly that though momma goes out the door, she will be back and I'm really okay. Slowly but surely as you stay out longer and longer but do come back in, he'll have grown to accept this action as inconsequential in his life and soon grow to accept your leaving without thinking a thing of it - he'll know he gets a good thing to play with and some good food, momma will be back and he'll accept it. B4 long, he will just accept your leaving without any toys or kongs or anything. After a while, include getting in the car in this training exercise, even starting it up and getting right back out and coming in the house without noticing him. Repeat repeat repeat - sitting in the car a while with it running. Eventually, drive around the block and then back home, inside, not noticing your dog and putting your things away, coming to sit in the same place on the couch where you always sit during this training. Once you have sat there a while after each training session, now it is time to play and reward that anxious baby who is learning to be a goooood dog so now have a blast with him. Lots of love, hugs, kisses, tugowar, etc. Happy, happy rewards for his efforts are definitely in order!
If you are patient enough to do this, it works EVERY SINGLE time and turns an anxious, crying dog into one that accepts leaving as just a part of his day. They soon learn to adjust their day to sleep while we are away and be ready to go when we get home.

I would also start him on a good positive-rewards training program such as in Tamar Geller's The Loved Dog book. This will teach him to bond well with you as you develop a strong relationship that he will not question, no matter what as he knows momma is always gonna keep it fun, loving and always rewarding for him.

[yoko]

My yorkie is going to be 7 years old next month and I call her my demon (golden compass) Only my daughter says Yoko has to be a boy Anyway she tears paper towels and kleenex to shreds in hiding places and she and I are closer than any other pet I have ever known - its as if she knows everything about me and watches my every move - I strongly advise you not to leave your baby alone for hours -

[GeorgiesMomma]

Originally Posted by yorkietalkjilly

Most anxious dogs that aren't used to it get nervous and anxious when their owners leave the home. Firstly, take all emotion out of your leaving. Do not feel sad for him or tell him goodbye - just like pack leaders in the wild don't when they decide to go on a hunt or take a walk - they just walk away and nobody freaks. They are impersonal and matter-of-fact in how and what they must do. So no emotional goodbyes or hello's when arriving home. Act like a pack leader. Your dog is a pack animal and is genetically in tune with a firm leader.
As far as your actual leaving, just slowly desensitize him to your leaving and soon he will come to accept it. But you must desensitize him to it slowly and allow him to adjust to each step. Be patient with that baby - his anxiety can be overcome with time and patience and knowing what to do. Keep your training sessions short and impersonal, matter-of-fact. (You can reward him once each exercise is over with a big, loving play session and lots of loving hugs, kisses.)
Give him a lovely food-stuffed kong toy, sit down and watch him playing with it, take up your keys and purse and whatever else you do as if to leave home and sit back down and just watch him. Don't go anywhere. Just sit there. Now this is key: keep repeating this for a day or two on a weekend over and over, giving him different things to chew on or play with as you get ready to go but don't.

After a day or two of this, when he's playing with his kong and has accepted your getting your things together, get your keys/purse, watch him for a while then get up and without saying one word to him or looking in his direction, just like an alpha wolf who acts in its pack without question from one of his pack members, walk out of your door outside. Shut it. Stand there 10 seconds and walk back in, DO NOT NOTICE HIM AT ALL, no matter how he's dancing around your feet or whining in joy, put your things away and sit back down where you usually sit when you watch him with his kong toy. Repeat this over & over and keep increasing your times outside to let him learn slowly that though momma goes out the door, she will be back and I'm really okay. Slowly but surely as you stay out longer and longer but do come back in, he'll have grown to accept this action as inconsequential in his life and soon grow to accept your leaving without thinking a thing of it - he'll know he gets a good thing to play with and some good food, momma will be back and he'll accept it. B4 long, he will just accept your leaving without any toys or kongs or anything. After a while, include getting in the car in this training exercise, even starting it up and getting right back out and coming in the house without noticing him. Repeat repeat repeat - sitting in the car a while with it running. Eventually, drive around the block and then back home, inside, not noticing your dog and putting your things away, coming to sit in the same place on the couch where you always sit during this training. Once you have sat there a while after each training session, now it is time to play and reward that anxious baby who is learning to be a goooood dog so now have a blast with him. Lots of love, hugs, kisses, tugowar, etc. Happy, happy rewards for his efforts are definitely in order!
If you are patient enough to do this, it works EVERY SINGLE time and turns an anxious, crying dog into one that accepts leaving as just a part of his day. They soon learn to adjust their day to sleep while we are away and be ready to go when we get home.

I would also start him on a good positive-rewards training program such as in Tamar Geller's The Loved Dog book. This will teach him to bond well with you as you develop a strong relationship that he will not question, no matter what as he knows momma is always gonna keep it fun, loving and always rewarding for him.

Jeanie as always great advice! Where we're you 5 years ago when I would go to leave and Georgie would give me those sweet Yorkie eyes and I would feel so bad?

[yorkietalkjilly]

Originally Posted by GeorgiesMomma

Jeanie as always great advice! Where we're you 5 years ago when I would go to leave and Georgie would give me those sweet Yorkie eyes and I would feel so bad?

LOL. Oh, Lord, don't think I don't get cow eyes from Tibbe some times but mostly he's cool with momma coming and going because he knows there's a big time coming- home party waiting. Once I'm home, things put away, emotions settled, we ROMP!

[GeorgiesMomma]

Originally Posted by yorkietalkjilly

LOL. Oh, Lord, don't think I don't get cow eyes from Tibbe some times but mostly he's cool with momma coming and going because he knows there's a big time coming- home party waiting. Once I'm home, things put away, emotions settled, we ROMP!

Awe Tibbe I get more emotion when I come and go from Georgie then I do my son LOL! He tells Georgie don't worry Mommy will be back HA!

[DBlain]

Originally Posted by LanaHamilton

That's a great idea! I am the one who feeds him and all the fun that comes with raising a yorkie. My husband adores Freddie too but I'm the care giver. I'll try that because it just breaks my heart to think that he thinks I have left him. Thank you so much for the advise!

that might work for when your husband is alone with him, for the most part even though my husband loves Lola and our past yorkies it is me they spend the most time with and me who does most of the work. It always bugs me that they will not even go for a walk with Ian, the pull to come back home and of course he gives in, but really does not take the time to go for a walk anyway. But it really his fault because he does nothing to bond with Lola or the others away from me. On the other hand my friend's husband walks their dog regularly on his own, takes her for bike rides, on outings, and on his boat, the dog has no problem being alone with him. If your husband is willing to go the extra mile, than some alone time for them might help, but it will not happen over night and be prepared for some resistance when you hubby would try to take him some place while you are home. Perhaps he should start by taking him out for fun if you have to leave.

[Yorkie24U]

Has anyone tried a "Thunder Shirt" ? It suppose to help with anxiety also, not only storms. Check out the video online at their website, pretty interesting. Guaranteed to work, if it don't, they take it back and give it to a rescue group.

[concretegurl]

Thundershirt is awesome!

[Nancy1999]

Originally Posted by yorkietalkjilly

Most anxious dogs that aren't used to it get nervous and anxious when their owners leave the home. Firstly, take all emotion out of your leaving. Do not feel sad for him or tell him goodbye - just like pack leaders in the wild don't when they decide to go on a hunt or take a walk - they just walk away and nobody freaks. They are impersonal and matter-of-fact in how and what they must do. So no emotional goodbyes or hello's when arriving home. Act like a pack leader. Your dog is a pack animal and is genetically in tune with a firm leader.
As far as your actual leaving, just slowly desensitize him to your leaving and soon he will come to accept it. But you must desensitize him to it slowly and allow him to adjust to each step. Be patient with that baby - his anxiety can be overcome with time and patience and knowing what to do. Keep your training sessions short and impersonal, matter-of-fact. (You can reward him once each exercise is over with a big, loving play session and lots of loving hugs, kisses.)
Give him a lovely food-stuffed kong toy, sit down and watch him playing with it, take up your keys and purse and whatever else you do as if to leave home and sit back down and just watch him. Don't go anywhere. Just sit there. Now this is key: keep repeating this for a day or two on a weekend over and over, giving him different things to chew on or play with as you get ready to go but don't.

After a day or two of this, when he's playing with his kong and has accepted your getting your things together, get your keys/purse, watch him for a while then get up and without saying one word to him or looking in his direction, just like an alpha wolf who acts in its pack without question from one of his pack members, walk out of your door outside. Shut it. Stand there 10 seconds and walk back in, DO NOT NOTICE HIM AT ALL, no matter how he's dancing around your feet or whining in joy, put your things away and sit back down where you usually sit when you watch him with his kong toy. Repeat this over & over and keep increasing your times outside to let him learn slowly that though momma goes out the door, she will be back and I'm really okay. Slowly but surely as you stay out longer and longer but do come back in, he'll have grown to accept this action as inconsequential in his life and soon grow to accept your leaving without thinking a thing of it - he'll know he gets a good thing to play with and some good food, momma will be back and he'll accept it. B4 long, he will just accept your leaving without any toys or kongs or anything. After a while, include getting in the car in this training exercise, even starting it up and getting right back out and coming in the house without noticing him. Repeat repeat repeat - sitting in the car a while with it running. Eventually, drive around the block and then back home, inside, not noticing your dog and putting your things away, coming to sit in the same place on the couch where you always sit during this training. Once you have sat there a while after each training session, now it is time to play and reward that anxious baby who is learning to be a goooood dog so now have a blast with him. Lots of love, hugs, kisses, tugowar, etc. Happy, happy rewards for his efforts are definitely in order!
If you are patient enough to do this, it works EVERY SINGLE time and turns an anxious, crying dog into one that accepts leaving as just a part of his day. They soon learn to adjust their day to sleep while we are away and be ready to go when we get home.

I would also start him on a good positive-rewards training program such as in Tamar Geller's The Loved Dog book. This will teach him to bond well with you as you develop a strong relationship that he will not question, no matter what as he knows momma is always gonna keep it fun, loving and always rewarding for him.

Great post!

My son's dog has been chewing the drywall in their home and they have been trying to change their behavior, because they have been very bad about making a fuss over him before they go and when they come home. The vet has given them a prescription for Amitriptyline, it's an antidepressant, and not a tranquilizer and doesn’t have the bad side effects of a tranquilizer. I've read some very good things about it, but you must use it in conjunction with behavior therapy, in other words, changing your behavior and yorkietalkjilly has given some great ways to do that.