I feel like a loser - YorkieTalk.com Forums

Dragonfly · 09-22-2006, 09:26 PM

If anyone cares, I am really tried of life

see with my illness I have no control over my life and it make me

some will understand and some will not, I am what my doc likes to calls house bound that's part of my illness where you can't leave your house but I do take my son to school,IF and that's a big IF I go any where someone has to be with me I don't do malls or wal-mart or any thing big all I do is put gas in my car ever two weeks

But to nite I went to my son's football game and now all I want to do is

there was a fight with a few football players and I talked to one mom of the boy his father is a cop,now my son will not speak to me

He yell at me for saying something to the guys mom now the boy will want to fight my son

and plus that he got hurt again.He is 16 and 6.1 and 248lbs he has hurt me I mean my arms he trys to break them his father took care of it this time. My life is sad I have no friends,all I got is my yorkies and husband and my laptop

just had to let it out. If you want to think less of me for this than do. BUT please don't judge me until you walk a mile in my shoes. I just don't know what to do anymore

Shadow · 09-22-2006, 09:35 PM

First of all sorry life has you down.
Do you suffer from agoraphobia? I'm a little confused about what you were saying about not leaving the house but I think that is what you meant.
If you don't mind me asking what kind of illness?

chattiesmom · 09-22-2006, 09:37 PM

Dragonfly, I am so very sorry you are having problems. What part of Georgia do you live in? I am a GRITS girl also -- Girl Raised In The South

Dragonfly · 09-22-2006, 09:41 PM

I have Bipolar, I live on Lookout Mountain right outside of chattanooga Tn
I really hate this illness I know stay on your meds.

Shadow · 09-22-2006, 09:43 PM

But you talked about being housebound. Is that because of a fear you have?

Dragonfly · 09-22-2006, 09:54 PM

Yes it is a fear, But it's more like I don't want to leave my house. See with bipolar you have all these up and downs like riding a roller coater ride BUT it never STOPS.

red98vett · 09-23-2006, 02:04 AM

OMG - Sending you hugs !! That sounds really devestating and it must be so hard for others to understand your illness- and yes - you have a REAL Illness - agoraphobia is not in your mind and it can be treated from what I've read about it.....

My concern was your son - what do you mean - he hurts you ? Your son hurts you physically ? Did I read that right ? cause I dont want to say anything till I know for sure that's what you meant. IF it IS what you mean to say - then yes- I'd say you have serious issues in your house honey....

IF YOU NEED TO TALK I'm here.....and you are NOT a loser !

RRRJeep861 · 09-23-2006, 05:06 AM

Forgive me if I over step here, I also am home 24/7 but i don't have bipolar. I know when I have just me, myself & I, it does drive me to a point of self pity on occasion. I find I need something in my life that gives me a reason to get out of bed, a purpose in life. With a computer you still have a lot you can do,..you just have to find your interests... There are a lot of universities now where you can take adult continuing education classes... an example in our college is psychology, personal finance, computers, personal enrichment(conquering shyness,stress etc.),etc. I really hope you feel better. Just trying to help .

RRRJeep861 · 09-23-2006, 05:06 AM

Forgive me if I over step here, I also am home 24/7 but I don't have bipolar. I know when I have just me, myself & I, it does drive me to a point of self pity on occasion. I find I need something in my life that gives me a reason to get out of bed, a purpose in life. With a computer you still have a lot you can do,..you just have to find your interests... There are a lot of universities now where you can take adult continuing education classes... an example in our college is psychology, personal finance, computers, personal enrichment(conquering shyness,stress etc.),etc. I really hope you feel better. Just trying to help .

chachi · 09-23-2006, 05:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dragonfly

I have Bipolar, I live on Lookout Mountain right outside of chattanooga Tn
I really hate this illness I know stay on your meds.

I have Bipolar too. Have you tried different meds. I have been on many untill I found one that worked for me. It is Geodon. I know before I didnt want t leave the house either but that is not healthy and I dont think your meds are working for you

ChestersMom · 09-23-2006, 05:23 AM

I am also bipolar, have been since I was nine years old. There is a great website called BipolarHappens. I highly recommend it. I do not suffer from agoraphobia, but I do have anxiety attacks occasionally. I'm on a not-so-often used medicine called Tofranil and have been for over 20 years. The doctors have tried other types, but none worked as well for me. It truly is extremely important that you find a doctor well versed in this disease. Best of luck to you.

What happened at the ballgame can be expected from time to time. You have no control over that, so don't beat yourself up about it. As for your son, maybe he is bipolar also as it is hereditary. If he's that big and that mean, maybe he needs to see a doctor also.

This disease is manageable, it just takes a lot of work and patience (of which we sometimes have none of!) Feel free to PM me any time you need someone to talk to that understands.

JiggityJig · 09-23-2006, 07:58 AM

I'm sorry you had the incident at the ballgame, and I'm concerned about the situation with your son, but if it makes you feel any better, I think there are times when we ALL feel like complete losers! I know I do from time to time! I know your situation is severe, but we all do have our ups and downs, and our times of being disappointed in ourselves. You are not as alone as you think!

Good luck!

ehunney · 09-23-2006, 08:11 AM

I'm so sorry you have to go through all this. Please keep your chin up though. One of my best friends always says. "Things are always better in the end. If it's not better, then it is not the end." I'm sending hugs!!!

fannie · 09-23-2006, 08:16 AM

I have no advice to offer you because I've never been in a situation like yours and I don't know anybody that is. I can't imagine what your daily life must be like. I will pray for you and your family!

Shadow · 09-23-2006, 08:17 AM

http://panicdisorder.about.com/cs/ag...aphobia101.htm

I suffered from this years ago and still do to some point. The main thing to try and do is not avoid places and face it head on. The longer you avoid the smaller your world will become.
Try and find a support group in your area for agoraphobia. It will help knowing others suffer also. You won't feel so alone. There is some grat books out, some with exercises to do to help you face and overcome your fears. Try and order this book,it is great! Good luck and pull yourself up.
As for your son , maybe some counseling would help.He might be suffering also.

http://www.amazon.com/Agoraphobia-Wo.../dp/1572243236

09-22-2006, 09:26 PM	#1
Dragonfly My Sun Shine's bright Donating Member Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Georiga Posts: 2,353	I feel like a loser If anyone cares, I am really tried of life see with my illness I have no control over my life and it make me some will understand and some will not, I am what my doc likes to calls house bound that's part of my illness where you can't leave your house but I do take my son to school,IF and that's a big IF I go any where someone has to be with me I don't do malls or wal-mart or any thing big all I do is put gas in my car ever two weeks But to nite I went to my son's football game and now all I want to do is there was a fight with a few football players and I talked to one mom of the boy his father is a cop,now my son will not speak to me He yell at me for saying something to the guys mom now the boy will want to fight my son and plus that he got hurt again.He is 16 and 6.1 and 248lbs he has hurt me I mean my arms he trys to break them his father took care of it this time. My life is sad I have no friends,all I got is my yorkies and husband and my laptop just had to let it out. If you want to think less of me for this than do. BUT please don't judge me until you walk a mile in my shoes. I just don't know what to do anymore __________________ My beautiful Sunshine Me & my Gang

09-22-2006, 09:37 PM	#3
chattiesmom Donating YT 10K Club Member Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Alabama Posts: 17,674	Dragonfly, I am so very sorry you are having problems. What part of Georgia do you live in? I am a GRITS girl also -- Girl Raised In The South __________________ Silk Step-In Harnesses www.foxypups.etsy.com

09-22-2006, 09:41 PM	#4
Dragonfly My Sun Shine's bright Donating Member Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Georiga Posts: 2,353	I have Bipolar, I live on Lookout Mountain right outside of chattanooga Tn I really hate this illness I know stay on your meds. __________________ My beautiful Sunshine Me & my Gang

09-22-2006, 09:54 PM	#6
Dragonfly My Sun Shine's bright Donating Member Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Georiga Posts: 2,353	Yes it is a fear, But it's more like I don't want to leave my house. See with bipolar you have all these up and downs like riding a roller coater ride BUT it never STOPS. __________________ My beautiful Sunshine Me & my Gang

09-23-2006, 02:04 AM	#7
red98vett Yorkie Kisses are the Best! Donating Member Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Houston TX Posts: 33,590 Blog Entries: 1	OMG - Sending you hugs !! That sounds really devestating and it must be so hard for others to understand your illness- and yes - you have a REAL Illness - agoraphobia is not in your mind and it can be treated from what I've read about it..... My concern was your son - what do you mean - he hurts you ? Your son hurts you physically ? Did I read that right ? cause I dont want to say anything till I know for sure that's what you meant. IF it IS what you mean to say - then yes- I'd say you have serious issues in your house honey.... IF YOU NEED TO TALK I'm here.....and you are NOT a loser ! __________________ Villette, Chanel & Cheri www.DesignsByVillette.net Custom Address Labels and Note Cards using YOUR Photos! Just Click HERE!

09-22-2006, 09:35 PM	#2
Shadow No Longer a Member Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: California Posts: 5,368	First of all sorry life has you down. Do you suffer from agoraphobia? I'm a little confused about what you were saying about not leaving the house but I think that is what you meant. If you don't mind me asking what kind of illness?

09-22-2006, 09:43 PM	#5
Shadow No Longer a Member Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: California Posts: 5,368	But you talked about being housebound. Is that because of a fear you have?

09-23-2006, 05:06 AM	#8
RRRJeep861 No Longer a Member Join Date: Apr 2005 Posts: 122	Forgive me if I over step here, I also am home 24/7 but i don't have bipolar. I know when I have just me, myself & I, it does drive me to a point of self pity on occasion. I find I need something in my life that gives me a reason to get out of bed, a purpose in life. With a computer you still have a lot you can do,..you just have to find your interests... There are a lot of universities now where you can take adult continuing education classes... an example in our college is psychology, personal finance, computers, personal enrichment(conquering shyness,stress etc.),etc. I really hope you feel better. Just trying to help .

09-23-2006, 05:23 AM	#11
ChestersMom YT 500 Club Member Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Bacliff, TX Posts: 947	I am also bipolar, have been since I was nine years old. There is a great website called BipolarHappens. I highly recommend it. I do not suffer from agoraphobia, but I do have anxiety attacks occasionally. I'm on a not-so-often used medicine called Tofranil and have been for over 20 years. The doctors have tried other types, but none worked as well for me. It truly is extremely important that you find a doctor well versed in this disease. Best of luck to you. What happened at the ballgame can be expected from time to time. You have no control over that, so don't beat yourself up about it. As for your son, maybe he is bipolar also as it is hereditary. If he's that big and that mean, maybe he needs to see a doctor also. This disease is manageable, it just takes a lot of work and patience (of which we sometimes have none of!) Feel free to PM me any time you need someone to talk to that understands.

09-23-2006, 07:58 AM	#12
JiggityJig YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: TX Posts: 1,226	I'm sorry you had the incident at the ballgame, and I'm concerned about the situation with your son, but if it makes you feel any better, I think there are times when we ALL feel like complete losers! I know I do from time to time! I know your situation is severe, but we all do have our ups and downs, and our times of being disappointed in ourselves. You are not as alone as you think! Good luck! __________________ OUR HEARTS KIKI MAZIE JIMBOB ELFIE OUR JOYS

09-23-2006, 08:11 AM	#13
ehunney Princess Bella Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: virginia Posts: 2,186	I'm so sorry you have to go through all this. Please keep your chin up though. One of my best friends always says. "Things are always better in the end. If it's not better, then it is not the end." I'm sending hugs!!! __________________ I miss you two more then words can express, but I still have hope that I'll find you and hold you again! Tucker and Teddy always say: "If I want it, it's mine and if I put it in my mouth, it's food."

09-23-2006, 08:16 AM	#14
fannie Donating YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: May 2006 Location: Missouri Posts: 1,693	I have no advice to offer you because I've never been in a situation like yours and I don't know anybody that is. I can't imagine what your daily life must be like. I will pray for you and your family! __________________ Steph, Mama to 6 skin babies and beautiful yorkies!

09-23-2006, 08:17 AM	#15
Shadow No Longer a Member Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: California Posts: 5,368	Read this http://panicdisorder.about.com/cs/ag...aphobia101.htm I suffered from this years ago and still do to some point. The main thing to try and do is not avoid places and face it head on. The longer you avoid the smaller your world will become. Try and find a support group in your area for agoraphobia. It will help knowing others suffer also. You won't feel so alone. There is some grat books out, some with exercises to do to help you face and overcome your fears. Try and order this book,it is great! Good luck and pull yourself up. As for your son , maybe some counseling would help.He might be suffering also. http://www.amazon.com/Agoraphobia-Wo.../dp/1572243236