Derby likes my husband more than me :( - YorkieTalk.com Forums

DerbyLayne · 03-08-2010, 11:22 AM

Ok, I know it sounds silly but I barely get a hello when I walk in the door. He jumps all over my husband, and freaks out when he leaves. He won't snuggle/sleep with me, but will with my husband (on the couch during day/nap time). Just yesterday I tried to snuggle up with him because he was in MY SPOT on the bed and he GROWLED at me! That is the first time Derby has ever done that! He even sat on me and whined the entire time because as soon as I moved he went into my spot.

I don't get it.

I am the only one who bathes and grooms him. I give him lots of love too! I pick him up and snuggle him, and I want him around... I take him for long walks when i can. My husband does take him out for walks more, and plays with him more, because I work more than he does, but is this a guy thing? Derby likes him more because he's a guy?

My husband wanted a big dog originally, and I said I wouldn't even consider getting a dog unless we had a smaller dog and we got Derby. He's a mixed breed (which we know now), but he's 10 pounds of cuteness as far as I'm concerned! I just want the dog that I picked out to LOVE ME more!!!

Here is a pic of us, and he was fine with my husband on the bed... but I had to get him to stay with me just get my husband to take a pic!!

Does any one else have this experience?

I'm starting to feel unloved by my own dog!

I want to tell him, hey: I chose you!!! but I joke that he's my husband's dog because of this whole situation... it's sad, really!!

yorkieusa · 03-08-2010, 12:13 PM

Try being his playmate for awhile and not just the one who bathes and feeds him. See if that changes his outlook. He's like a toddler, so you're going to have to think like a toddler to figure this out.

zekie's mom · 03-08-2010, 01:22 PM

All of my dogs and cats over the years have liked my husband best. I think it is because he is calmer than I am. Sometimes I think they gravitate toward the person who is not so lovey dovey.

RoxyLuv · 03-08-2010, 01:22 PM

He may change yet. He's still young & they go through different stages. I felt the same way for awhile. I was the bad one, cuz I made up the rules, did all that stuff to her, made her learn things. DH reaped all the benefits (big dog guy)! Now, at 16 mo, she sleeps w/me more, follows me everywhere & I think dh is a little jealous now! lol! I just LUV it!!! Be patient... it could turn around yet.

Marie 1 · 03-08-2010, 01:31 PM

I think it is great that Penny snuggles next to my DH in the mornings. I get to sleep in longer. She misses me when I'm gone but really misses DH when he is gone. Just part of marriage. She follows me through out the house and DH too. Some days she is his dog and some days mine. We both get a break that way.

chandracz · 03-08-2010, 01:40 PM

My boyfriend had this problem for a LONG time. Of course my reason was different. I had Bailey BEFORE we even met or moved in with my boyfriend, but it turned into my boyfriend feeling unloved eventually. Here's what I told my bf. Derby can pick up on your frustration, sadness and all of your emotions and it's probably really confusing him. Whereas your husband is calm, playful and doesn't have an "issue" with Derby. Again, Derby can pick up on both sets of emotions. If it were you, who would you want to be around? Try to be really in tune to your emotions when you're around him. I had my bf give him lots of fruit treats and just have fun with him. Take him for walks as much as possible. Play with him as much as possible. Don't force him to sit with you, because believe it or not, that will make him not want to sit with you. I always tell my bf if you respect him, he will respect you... I hope this helps!!!

Good luck and don't worry it will come!!!

Quote:

Originally Posted by DerbyLayne

Ok, I know it sounds silly but I barely get a hello when I walk in the door. He jumps all over my husband, and freaks out when he leaves. He won't snuggle/sleep with me, but will with my husband (on the couch during day/nap time). Just yesterday I tried to snuggle up with him because he was in MY SPOT on the bed and he GROWLED at me! That is the first time Derby has ever done that! He even sat on me and whined the entire time because as soon as I moved he went into my spot.

I don't get it.

I am the only one who bathes and grooms him. I give him lots of love too! I pick him up and snuggle him, and I want him around... I take him for long walks when i can. My husband does take him out for walks more, and plays with him more, because I work more than he does, but is this a guy thing? Derby likes him more because he's a guy?

My husband wanted a big dog originally, and I said I wouldn't even consider getting a dog unless we had a smaller dog and we got Derby. He's a mixed breed (which we know now), but he's 10 pounds of cuteness as far as I'm concerned! I just want the dog that I picked out to LOVE ME more!!!

Here is a pic of us, and he was fine with my husband on the bed... but I had to get him to stay with me just get my husband to take a pic!!

Does any one else have this experience?

I'm starting to feel unloved by my own dog!

I want to tell him, hey: I chose you!!! but I joke that he's my husband's dog because of this whole situation... it's sad, really!!

xxmxaxrxyxx · 03-08-2010, 02:04 PM

guess it is a good reason to get yourself "YOUR OWN YORKIE" hehe....

OwnedByJezebel · 03-08-2010, 03:33 PM

Have some "alone time" with Derby that is all fun, like going for walks or going to the dog park.

red98vett · 03-08-2010, 04:25 PM

haha - don't mean to laugh but I'd probably feel the same - I have the opposite problem - my 2 girls always freak out when I leave or came home - they've always followed me everywhere

The only time they hung out with my (late) husband was when I wasn't around....I used to plop them on his lap or sit really close to him so he could hold them.....it sort of worked but I always felt bad .....they loved him I know but showed it in different ways than with me ...so I see what you're saying.

Yorkies tend to bond with one person.....normally males to women and females to men - I sure don't know where that came from cause my girls are super-glued to my butt and always have been.

Martini19 · 03-08-2010, 05:31 PM

I would definitely try playing with him a lot more...and giving him a few treats while playing!! My bf is home a lot more than me so he spends a lot more time playing with the pets than me...and ive noticed that if i dont make it a point to play with the puppy when i come home...that after awhile she starts to drift towards my bf more...but then ill just start playing with her more and shes back to fairly playing both teams!! haha

Krystee · 03-08-2010, 07:00 PM

I would be going crazy if this had happened with me when I got Tobie. Thankfully, Tobie is a momma's boy. However, this did happen to my dad when my parents got a puppy. She really wasn't a fan of my dad and wanted nothing to do with him. It drove him CRAZY and here's what he did. He would play with her and let her chase him around the living room. When she saw how fun he was, she warmed up more and more to him and now he's her most favorite person in the world. I mean, to the point where she gets depressed when he has to leave overnight out of town. I definitely think playing with him and giving him treats is the way to go and my dad and Sadie are proof that this can change

SassyAnn101 · 03-08-2010, 07:28 PM

Well I know how ya feel I wanted Haley before Christmas. It ended up working out that I could bring her home the first of December, so she was going to be my Christmas present, but noooo from the min. she seen my son Tanner she has been totally in love. I am only noticed if I am holding a piece of CHICKEN in my hand. Actually Chip is the only baby who really Loves me Tenci and Trouble love us both. Gus, Pee Wee, and now Haley love Tanner. Chip loves me. I keep telling myself one day she will love me (when he leaves for college)

violet voon · 03-08-2010, 07:58 PM

Hey don't feel bad!

When we have guests, Sugar never wanted to sit on my laps, she would turn her head around, play with them and ignore me TOTALLY when I call

She just LOVES to play.
I guess you can give him more treats and play with him more?

noisinka · 03-09-2010, 01:04 AM

I'm Sandy's playmate and the man is his master. Sometimes I do feel like Sandy likes him more. He always gets REALLY excited when daddy comes home.

sadies mom · 03-09-2010, 03:44 AM

I feel your pain. Your story could be mine. The difference is she does cuddle with me and is just as happy to see each of us but, if she had to choose, it would be her daddy. We both came to the conclusion that she would probably follow HIM off the face of the earth.

03-08-2010, 11:22 AM	#1
DerbyLayne YT Addict Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: Toronto, ON Posts: 390 Blog Entries: 1	Derby likes my husband more than me :( Ok, I know it sounds silly but I barely get a hello when I walk in the door. He jumps all over my husband, and freaks out when he leaves. He won't snuggle/sleep with me, but will with my husband (on the couch during day/nap time). Just yesterday I tried to snuggle up with him because he was in MY SPOT on the bed and he GROWLED at me! That is the first time Derby has ever done that! He even sat on me and whined the entire time because as soon as I moved he went into my spot. I don't get it. I am the only one who bathes and grooms him. I give him lots of love too! I pick him up and snuggle him, and I want him around... I take him for long walks when i can. My husband does take him out for walks more, and plays with him more, because I work more than he does, but is this a guy thing? Derby likes him more because he's a guy? My husband wanted a big dog originally, and I said I wouldn't even consider getting a dog unless we had a smaller dog and we got Derby. He's a mixed breed (which we know now), but he's 10 pounds of cuteness as far as I'm concerned! I just want the dog that I picked out to LOVE ME more!!! Here is a pic of us, and he was fine with my husband on the bed... but I had to get him to stay with me just get my husband to take a pic!! Does any one else have this experience? I'm starting to feel unloved by my own dog! I want to tell him, hey: I chose you!!! but I joke that he's my husband's dog because of this whole situation... it's sad, really!! Attached Thumbnails __________________ Last edited by DerbyLayne; 03-08-2010 at 11:23 AM.

03-08-2010, 12:13 PM	#2
yorkieusa Crazy about Kacee! Donating Member Join Date: May 2005 Location: Kansas Posts: 21,173	Try being his playmate for awhile and not just the one who bathes and feeds him. See if that changes his outlook. He's like a toddler, so you're going to have to think like a toddler to figure this out. __________________ Karen Kacee Muffin 1991-2005 Rest in Peace My Little Angel

03-08-2010, 01:22 PM	#4
RoxyLuv Donating YT 500 Club Member Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: Michigan Posts: 982 Blog Entries: 1	He may change yet. He's still young & they go through different stages. I felt the same way for awhile. I was the bad one, cuz I made up the rules, did all that stuff to her, made her learn things. DH reaped all the benefits (big dog guy)! Now, at 16 mo, she sleeps w/me more, follows me everywhere & I think dh is a little jealous now! lol! I just LUV it!!! Be patient... it could turn around yet. __________________ June ~ Roxy LUV LUV

03-08-2010, 01:31 PM	#5
Marie 1 Senior Yorkie Talker Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Spokane, Wa Posts: 121	I think it is great that Penny snuggles next to my DH in the mornings. I get to sleep in longer. She misses me when I'm gone but really misses DH when he is gone. Just part of marriage. She follows me through out the house and DH too. Some days she is his dog and some days mine. We both get a break that way. __________________ Marie

03-08-2010, 02:04 PM	#7
xxmxaxrxyxx Missing Yoshi Everyday! Donating Member Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Wichita, KS Posts: 15,110 Blog Entries: 3	guess it is a good reason to get yourself "YOUR OWN YORKIE" hehe.... __________________ Yoshi Mei Ling Ting Ting Ting Ki Sun Hye Yukio Kioshi

03-08-2010, 01:22 PM	#3
zekie's mom YT Addict Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: PA & FL Posts: 403	All of my dogs and cats over the years have liked my husband best. I think it is because he is calmer than I am. Sometimes I think they gravitate toward the person who is not so lovey dovey.

03-08-2010, 03:33 PM	#8
OwnedByJezebel YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Texas Posts: 1,921	Have some "alone time" with Derby that is all fun, like going for walks or going to the dog park. __________________ Life is merrier with a Yorkshire Terrier! Jezebel & Chuy ... RIP: Barkley Loosie & Sassy

03-08-2010, 04:25 PM	#9
red98vett Yorkie Kisses are the Best! Donating Member Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Houston TX Posts: 33,590 Blog Entries: 1	haha - don't mean to laugh but I'd probably feel the same - I have the opposite problem - my 2 girls always freak out when I leave or came home - they've always followed me everywhere The only time they hung out with my (late) husband was when I wasn't around....I used to plop them on his lap or sit really close to him so he could hold them.....it sort of worked but I always felt bad .....they loved him I know but showed it in different ways than with me ...so I see what you're saying. Yorkies tend to bond with one person.....normally males to women and females to men - I sure don't know where that came from cause my girls are super-glued to my butt and always have been. __________________ Villette, Chanel & Cheri www.DesignsByVillette.net Custom Address Labels and Note Cards using YOUR Photos! Just Click HERE!

03-08-2010, 05:31 PM	#10
Martini19 Senior Yorkie Talker Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: Reading, PA Posts: 98	I would definitely try playing with him a lot more...and giving him a few treats while playing!! My bf is home a lot more than me so he spends a lot more time playing with the pets than me...and ive noticed that if i dont make it a point to play with the puppy when i come home...that after awhile she starts to drift towards my bf more...but then ill just start playing with her more and shes back to fairly playing both teams!! haha __________________ It's 5 O'clock somewhere, everyone needs at least a sip of a MARTINI at least once a day!! "Chocolate Martini" - My baby since May 2009

03-08-2010, 07:00 PM	#11
Krystee Tobie's Mommy Donating Member Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: Oklahoma Posts: 901	I would be going crazy if this had happened with me when I got Tobie. Thankfully, Tobie is a momma's boy. However, this did happen to my dad when my parents got a puppy. She really wasn't a fan of my dad and wanted nothing to do with him. It drove him CRAZY and here's what he did. He would play with her and let her chase him around the living room. When she saw how fun he was, she warmed up more and more to him and now he's her most favorite person in the world. I mean, to the point where she gets depressed when he has to leave overnight out of town. I definitely think playing with him and giving him treats is the way to go and my dad and Sadie are proof that this can change __________________ [CENTER]Mama to 1 skin baby & 2 fur babies [B]Arilynn Marie Tobie Teddington Dash

03-08-2010, 07:28 PM	#12
SassyAnn101 Donating YT 500 Club Member Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: Tennessee Posts: 647	Well I know how ya feel I wanted Haley before Christmas. It ended up working out that I could bring her home the first of December, so she was going to be my Christmas present, but noooo from the min. she seen my son Tanner she has been totally in love. I am only noticed if I am holding a piece of CHICKEN in my hand. Actually Chip is the only baby who really Loves me Tenci and Trouble love us both. Gus, Pee Wee, and now Haley love Tanner. Chip loves me. I keep telling myself one day she will love me (when he leaves for college) Attached Thumbnails __________________ My Gang: Tanner,Trouble, Chip, Gus, Pee Wee,Haley, Razzle, & Pixie Rest In Peace My Sweet Gizmo & My Pretty Pretty Princess Tenci Last edited by SassyAnn101; 03-08-2010 at 07:29 PM.

03-08-2010, 07:58 PM	#13
violet voon YT Addict Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: M'sia Posts: 454	Hey don't feel bad! When we have guests, Sugar never wanted to sit on my laps, she would turn her head around, play with them and ignore me TOTALLY when I call She just LOVES to play. I guess you can give him more treats and play with him more? __________________ Sugar - 6th February 2009

03-09-2010, 01:04 AM	#14
noisinka YT Addict Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Europe Posts: 259	I'm Sandy's playmate and the man is his master. Sometimes I do feel like Sandy likes him more. He always gets REALLY excited when daddy comes home.

03-09-2010, 03:44 AM	#15
sadies mom Senior Yorkie Talker Join Date: May 2008 Location: Pa Posts: 178	I feel your pain. Your story could be mine. The difference is she does cuddle with me and is just as happy to see each of us but, if she had to choose, it would be her daddy. We both came to the conclusion that she would probably follow HIM off the face of the earth.